“Mom, have you seen the guy who’s the voice of Puss in Boots?” the Roo asked.
Oh yes. I’ve always been a sucker for Latin lovers. I thought I was over it until my midlife crisis recently rekindled los fuegos. My husband knows that a big part of why he doesn’t need to bother to come to horse shows with me is that his supportive presence cuts into my time flirting with other men who are, for the most part, chulos.
Fortunately he is secure and trusting enough that he thinks it’s funny when I email him pictures of cute boys who are young enough to have been my children had I been a trampier teenager. When I text him to tell him Have fallen madly in love w Peruvian who lks like A Banderas. Flying 2 Peru 2moro in his lap. Pls bring kids to visit for Xmas if ur not 2 pissed, he laughs and shows it to his friends.
So of course I know who’s the voice of Puss in Boots, the Nasonex bee and the hot pervert in ¡Atame!
“Yep. His name is Antonio Banderas. He’s very handsome. He’s Spanish. I think men who speak Spanish are sexy.”
“What’s ‘sexy’?”
Hmmm. Not sure how much a 6-year-old needs to know about this. Better stick to general terms here.
“Handsome, attractive, good-looking…” I thought those were safe.
“Oh. Like Daddy tries to be sexy to keep your horse show boyfriends away?”
¡Madre de Dios! Where did that come from?!
Perhaps from those photos and texts, Mrs. Science.
If I were smarter, I’d remember my kids are much smarter than I am. Unfortunately for both us, they’re much, MUCH smarter than I am.
A-Parent-ly Insane 